Write About the Tears

Write about the tears” my mentor said on July 26, 2019 while I lamented over my most recent burden.  Before I could respond, she added, “…write about the tissue, the thing that collects the tears!”  In retrospect, I wonder if she is a glutton for my punishment ~ at the time, I cried harder.  It’s not that I am a stranger to tears, I just hate the rushing fire that starts inside of me, the swelling grief making its way to the part of me that knows full well, “You ought to have released this way before now.” I deeply dislike the burning of my cheeks, stained by all that eye water that certainly has a cause.  And I surely do not want to give credit to a pain so great that I have to actually deal with my disappointment, despair, and powerlessness.  All that poor tissue…  Lawdamercy ~ nothing is as formidable as an “ugly cry” in my opinion, except maybe the conditions which created the tears and all that poor, used tissue. 

Today I read from Jeremiah, Sirach, the Psalms, the Wisdom of Solomon, Ephesians, and John’s good news ~ poetry, prose, personification and the like, and I hear the writers from long ago proclaim to their readers that G*d does things to comfort our suffering even when we create it; that flipping the script and doing the things which are best instead of what we prefer are often in order and lead to good results; that it is our responsibility to remind ourselves to speak or write about what we hold in our hearts about Spirit; and even that certain hopes and expectations are not in vain. 

I do not know where your tears come from nor what they mean to you.  I am not there when you wipe your eyes.  I am; however, one of many, like you, who feel deeply the swelling grief of loved ones who thought it should have been but it didn’t ever happen, human beings asleep on benches and sidewalks, children in cages, animals in Australia and on road sides, families and fellow sufferers of clients who overdosed, and queer and Black folk whose lives were cut short ~ and I continue to show up and create change regarding the things I cannot accept.  My desire for us is that we give credit to the pain in a way that motivates us to healthy and productive actions, the kind that are inclusive of our love for one another and reflective of the nature of the One who’s breath we bear.  Your incarnation is important and richly beautiful, too.  Never underestimate that…

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